29April2001 #0118.html

Kate's Graduation

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Dear Paul and Kate, Melanie and Jared, Bridget and Justin, Sara, Ben and Sarah, Heather, Audrey, Rachel, and Matt via hardcopy,

cc: file, Tony Hafen, Pauline Nelson via mail, Sara and Des Penny, Claude and Katherine Warner, Lloyd and Luana Warner, Diane Cluff, Maxine Shirts via mail.

Welcome to "Thoughtlets." This is a weekly review of an idea, belief, thought, or words that will hopefully be of some benefit to you, my children, with an electronic copy to on-line extended family members. Any of you can ask me not to clutter your mail box at any time.

"This week was dominated by Kate's graduation from BYU. I did spend the first two days of the week in Houston. Monday morning I worked at Chroma on the II&T Matagorda project from 9-11:45. Then I drove back to Shillington and picked up Dick Coons at 12:15 for a lunch with Bob Williams of Dover. It was a neat discussion, and I hope to see several opportunities come out of it. I dropped Dick off at his house at about 2:45. There were a couple of phone conversations with Swede Nelson, who is going to Florida to meet with potential investors the week of May 7th. Also Peter Duncan called and said a Texaco project he is going to have me work on, which will help work off the advances Chroma has paid us, will be ready to start next week. I was busy creating a master spread-sheet of projects until late Monday night. I had a brief panic attack Monday night, wondering if I'm doing the right things, and worrying about all of you, and how everything is going to work out. I ate some buttered saltines and it went away.

Tuesday morning the lunch with Prakla canceled. I ended up working at the house until 11:00. There was a good conversation with Ted Collins in Midland. He called to say he was coming to Houston on Thursday and Friday, and of course, I was going to be in Utah for Kate's graduation. Oh well! I got to Chroma at 11:30, and worked until 3:30, when I e-mailed the results to Les Denham at II&T. I drove to Hobby airport via the tollroad, and slept most of the way to Salt Lake via Albequerque. Paul was waiting for me in Salt Lake.

Wednesday morning Paul and I left at 6:30 for Cedar. We stopped just past Santaquin to take pictures of three elk next to the freeway. They were big beautiful animals. We got to Cedar about 10:00, and talked briefly to Audrey and Grandma Shirts. I took Mom and Paul to Hunan to eat Peiking Duck, which Mom called "Open-Eyed Duck" because she doesn't like the thought of eating "Peeking Duck." We visited Uncle Lloyd and Aunt Luana and stopped to see Katherine. We saw Emma. She looks good and said to say hi. Paul dropped me off at Ward and Fern Abbotts and went to play with Kate's little brother and sister. I showed Ward and Fern the photos I took, which are at www.walden3d.com/Abbott. I had misspelled Abbott as Abbot. Oh well! Fixed it. Both Ward and Fern were really excited about the pages, and see great potential for this project. I hope to get started on it in earnest this summer. It will become a very valuable asset for Dynamic. Ward has decided he wants to serve a mission at Temple Square. So they bought a townhome overlooking the conference center. After showing me the pictures, describing the amenities and particularly the view, I've decided Andrea and I are going to buy a commondimun there too, if we can ever get enough ahead financially to do so.

Paul picked me up and we got to Cedar just in time to pick up Grandma Shirts, Heather, and get Brian at 6:00. We went up Cedar Canyon and ate at Milts. I sure enjoy going there, although on top of Hunan at lunch, it was definitely too much food for a single day. Heather and I dropped off Grandma Shirts, and Paul and Bryan, who were going to make a video and ended up playing around, and we went to listen to Aunt Sara's concert. Even I could tell it was hard music to play. Very nice and thoroughly enjoyable. Afterwards we went to see Steve and Jill and their new daughter. My first, and probably only niece born after Andrea and I were married. Then Grandma Shirts dropped me off at Sara and Des' and we talked until Heather got back with the car. Audrey went to Lake Powell and, Audrey, I was very dissapointed there was not an opportunity to spend some time talking to you. Thanks for calling me, and I look forward to spending some time talking on the phone, when you have time.

I was at Sara and Des' at 5:00 AM to pick up Paul. We left by 5:30 and were across from Point of the Mountain, coming up the back way at 8:30. Paul slept all the way to Salt Lake. It was good to see Bob Ehrlich again. After about an hour of listening to Bob and I, Paul looked at us and said `Are you two brothers?' We went down and spent some time with Parker Gay. He showed us around his compound, and he has two, maybe 3 rental houses we could use as offices for Dynamic Resouces, Resource Technologies (Dick Coons, who wants to move to Salt Lake), Residuum Energy, Ed Gray, Riley Skeen, and me, when I'm in Salt Lake. Ed drove down from Woods Cross and Bob Ehrlich and Mike Dropkin joined Parker, Paul, and me for lunch at Trolly Square. We left as the conversation was getting on a roll to get back to Provo for Kate's graduation Commencement exercises. Paul tells me he drove too fast, and I was asleep, so I'm not responsible for his choices. Or am I?

I was very impressed with the BYU Commencement Exercises. I don't see, after a quick search, that I mentioned that we chose not to have cap and gown when we graduated from High School, that I missed my graduation from The University of Utah since Marti and I decided we would never have another chance to travel and went to Europe during graduation, and I was in Houston when I graduated from SMU, and did not want to drive back up for graduation ceremony. So Roice's graduation was my first commencement. I was impressed with the outdoor meeting, and all of the events. Then Andrea and I were able to go to Ben and Sarah's graduation, and it was really impressive to see all of the students in the large stadium. And frankly, I liked Kate's Commencement best of all three of these. It is probably because the messages echoed my concerns, and mostly because there was testimony shared, by member and non-member. There 9,000 graduates, 2,600 more than a similar sized class in 1991. Elder Merril J. Bateman of the Quorum of the 70, who is the President of BYU stressed:

  1. commitment to family.
  2. commitment to truth in general.
  3. commitment to community.

He went on to say:

`It is key to perform simple acts of service. The less time a child spends with his parents in the early years, the more troubles they have. Do not treat familial promises lightly.'

After conferring the degrees he had the students stand and applaud parents, family and friends for their support. Then the BYU Alumni President inducted the graduates into the 384,000 BYU Alumni and stressed how graduates could continue to communicate with BYU:

  1. thourgh quarterly magazine
  2. through website, which provides self-selected news of interest through mybyu.com, and provides a permanent BYU e-mail address, like the walden3d.com e-mail address I set up for each of you (../0038.html)
  3. BYU TV on satellite and cable
  4. 115 BYU Alumni Chapters

He stressed the word replenish, saying it is important to give back to BYU and to the Church. He was singing my song. As a member of the church we have down the multiply commandment, and seem to forget the replenish part of the same commandment.

Bonnie Marie Ashby, (I wonder if she is a descendent of Nathaniel Ashby, whom I referred to last week in 0117.html), a music graduate said:

`Commencement means a beginning. It is not enough to be good. We must be good for something. The world's greatest need in this time of self-indulgence and moral degradation is for an example. We are in the salvation business, and music is a tool. It is the same for each discipline. We must be about our Father's business.'

Congressman Tom Lantos, who was given an honorary Ph.D. said:

`Human suffering anywhere among any people is a matter of concern to us. BYU is remarkably like minded and homogeneous in values and in having served a mission. The values you share are important. However, it is possible to become too focused on those with the same values. When I was the same age as you who are graduating I was a member of the Hungarian community in the 1930's and 1940's This was a community of non-caring and indifference. In a few months 600,000 Jews from my community perished at Auschwitz. A week ago today I was in the capital rotunda when President Bush spoke in rememberance of the Holocaust and pointed to me as a survivor. Ralph Walenberg, a Swede, an architect, who voluntarly left affluence and put his body between Hitler's war machine and the Jews, who spoke Swedish, was wealthy, was a Christian Lutheran, daily offered his life to save 100,000 Jews, of whom I am but one. As you go out from this magnificant, yet sheltered place, you will face a world where most do not share your faith, and many do not share your values. A wise old Rabbi taught by asking a question: How can you tell the moment when the night turns to day? It is not when you can tell your roof from your neighbor's roof. It is not when you can tell a dog from a wolf in the woods. It is when you can look into the eyes of a stranger, and recognize your brother.'

Gohn Gallivan, retired Editor of the Salt Lake Tribune, was also given an honorary Ph.D. He said:

`How can one accept a reward for being in love. Utah has been my love affair for years. There is so little time to make our contribution. Precious few goals are achievable in one life time. The Magnesium Project on the Great Salt Lake took 36 years, and it only created 400 jobs. It took 20 years to create the Salt Palace, and another 20 years to turn it into a useful convention center. Impatience is the true value. In helping mankind be impatient. All men are created equal is mostly in the eyes of God. No church provides more to others per member than the one owning BYU. If all the haves share with all the have nots millenial equality is achievable. If the World Wide Web is properly utilized, it can unravel Babel.'

Joseph B. Worthlin, an Apostle, was given an honorary Ph.D. He said:

`All of us over our life time collect gems. I always loved animals, especially my dog named Ruff. Ruff chased motorcycles, including a policeman's down the street, until he was shot in the foot. Then he stopped chasing motorcycles. Don't be like my dog. In dog years my life is antedelluvian. Principles I have learned are: 1. Study the life of our Savior Jesus Christ and emulate his example. 2. Love our neighbor as ourselves, morning and comforting. 3. Learn to work. That which you have been given, earn in order to proceed. God will quicken our footsteps if we first move our feet. 4. Be of good cheer and have faith Heavenly Father is with you. Helen Keller said: `We can never learn to be brave if there are only times of happiness.' This is a time for great and mighty deeds, for noble thoughts.'

Thomas S. Monson, of the First Presidency was conducting and said:

`The word commencement does not describe ceasation of activity. We honor graduates in a world too often mediocre. From The Tempest: `What is past is prologue. The future is in our hands.' Graduates: 1. Labor to learn. 2. Strive to serve. Remember vision without work is daydreaming. 3. Think to thank. 4. Pause to pray. Pray for power equal to your tasks. An educated man can accomplish many things. Thinking is the hardest work any of us can do.'

We took digital pictures, and they will be put on the web sometime at: http://www.walden3d.com/photos/Family/03_PaulKate/Graduation_Kate. Randy and Kathryn Shirts took us out to dinner. It was a nice evening. It is funny to watch Paul and Erika, who are always going after each other. Kristen swears she is not going to college this fall. She has been accepted to BYU and UU, but not Stanford. Randy provided some additional background on why Lantos was given an honorary degree. His daughter is a member of the church. When his Grandson arrived at the Missionary Training Center, Lantos showed up to talk him out of going to Poland. He relented and said he would come to Poland in a year to pick him up. He did, and the Grandson would not come home.

Friday morning I worked on my paper for the OTC on Monday. Kate cooked German pancakes. Paul wrote out the recipe for me:

`German Pancakes: 1 cup milk 1 cup flour 6 eggs 1/4 teaspoon salt 6 tablespoons margine Beat eggs and add milk, flour, and salt. In 9" x 13" pan melt butter in the oven until melted. Pour batter into hot pan. Bake at 425 degrees for 20-25 minutes. to serve cut into squares. Serve with jam or syrup or both.'

Val and Debbie Jones, and three of their kids arrived about 11:00 with a dozen containers of fresh strawberry jam as a present for Kate's graduation. We went over to the Convocation, where Kate walked for her diploma, about 12:30. One in 5 graduates from BYU are in Kate's college.

Matthew Grow, Valedictorian from History spoke:

`The integration of the secular and the spiritual is a key differentiator at BYU. D&C 93 says to hasten to gain secular knowledge to enhance Zion.'

Professor Kay Smith of Psychology said:

`At BYU's entrance is a sign which says `Enter to Learn, Go Forth to Serve.' Competition can bring out the best and the worst in us. Pride gets no pleasure out of having something. However, it is comparison that makes us proud. Once the competition is gone, pride is gone. It is hypocritical to do the things mentioned in D&C 121. We can not treat others in a non-loving way. We must use sweet boldness. We must be sweet and we must be bold.'

We partied most of the afternoon. Kate's younger sister Lori did not like having her picture taken, and we had fun with the digital camera. There was great bar-b-que steak and chicken, potato salad, chips, drinks, and chocolate moose. It was a nice evening, even if Kate and three of her girl friends got into a girl talk mode. I just tuned them off and went to sleep on the couch until someone knocked on the glass window from the hammock outside.

Somehow I didn't plan leaving for the airport right, and ended up driving too fast to make it there by 6:00 for a 6:30 flight. Oh well! Made it. It was a great visit. It would be nice for each of you need to send Kate congratulations, if you haven't already. The flight back was uneventful. I got to the house a half-hour before Matt's soccer game. He did good. They beat about 5 to 2. He enjoys that a lot. Andrea and I went to see a movie by the guy who made the movie about the missionaries in California at the Tinseltown Cinema where I used to go a lot. It was a good murder mystery. I'm not sure about the background messages, showing the sacrament, and other sacred things the way they do. The movie is called Brigham City, and I encourage each of you to see it and to consider the message.

Again, Kate, congratulations! It is a significant milestone, and I look forward to each of you reaching the milestone marked by Kate's graduation."

I'm interested in sharing weekly a "thoughtlet" (little statements of big thoughts which mean a lot to me) with you because I know how important the written word can be. I am concerned about how easy it is to drift and forget our roots and our potential among all of distractions of daily life. To download any of these thoughtlets go to http://www.walden3d.com/thoughtlets or e-mail me at rnelson@walden3d.com.

With all my love,
Dad
(H. Roice Nelson, Jr.)

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Copyright © 2001 H. Roice Nelson, Jr.