cc: file, Diane Cluff, Darrell and Nancy Krueger, Pauline Nelson via mail, Sara and Des Penny, Grandma Hafen via Tony Hafen, Claude and Katherine Warner, and Lloyd and Luana Warner.
"Mike Smith married Janet McIntire last night at the Bear Creek Chapel. Mike asked me to be his best man. This was the first, and probably only time I have had - will have - the opportunity to be the best man at a wedding. My preparation was a walk through on Thursday evening (which possibly happened because of Ben and Sarah's rehersal dinner, and my offhand asking Mike if he was going to have a rehersal). Isn't it interesting how we all are always learning from each other.
Recently I learned how to do word searches in Unix, and, since walden3d.com is on the Sun computer, I used my new knowledge to do a word search through past Thoughtlets for `Mike Smith.' He is referenced in 9703, 9706, 9724, 9750, 9802, and now 9831. Except for a couple of months, when a newly assigned Home Teacher didn't visit Mike, I have been his Home Teacher since he was baptized 2 1/2 years ago. Just prior to the wedding last night, he introduced me to some of his family with the words `This is my best friend,' when we both knew he meant to say `This is my best man.' And it really doesn't matter one way or the other. What is truly wonderful is how good of friends we do become with those we serve. Because of pride and insecurity I do not seek out new friends. My life has truly been blessed by knowing Mike Smith and I am thankful my Home Teaching calling got me outside of my insolated `safe' world.
Needless to say there are countless examples of friendship through service. I received the following words on a thank you note this week:
After I read this, I almost felt like a best man. Then my insecurities and the facts of my life brought me back to reality.
Last Sunday Melanie and Sara and I left Cedar City at 8:10 and made it to the Bloomington 7th Ward just before church started. It was good to see the Warners, and Emma joined us after church when we took my Mom to lunch at Tony Roma's. It was nice. When we dropped Emma off, Claude and Katherine showed the girls their birds. I continue to think I would like to find another home for Einstein, and get some birds to sing to me and keep me company. We went over to Uncle Lloyd and Aunt Luana's for a few minutes and saw the remodeling they have done to their living room. It is nice. In my book, Lloyd is definitly the best man. Sara drove both to St. George and back to Cedar City, and I used the time to work on the Legacy Thoughtlet (.../9830.html). I finished and sent it from your Aunt Sara's house. This was the first of what will likely be many remotely sent Thoughtlets. We drove to Salt Lake up the back roads. There were two herds of cattle, two deer, a thunderstorm, and no problems.
Monday we got up and were at the Salt Lake Airport checked in by 8:20 AM. I had a meeting at 8:30, and it was fun to hear the girls describe their thoughts about the man I met with. I remember they said he had a big head. We got back to the house in time for Family Home Evening. Sara and Amy joined us for a while. It was the first FHE swimming party, and I ended up spending most of the evening talking to Mike and Janet in my role as his best man. I was able to use some of the PAIRS material to help relieve some last minute wedding jitters.
Tuesday I went into the office long enough to find out there is a very serious misuse of the $300,000 ernest money provided to start Continuum Resources. I still left at 10:00 and just made the 11:00 Southwest shuttle out of Hobby to Dallas. Doug Harless and I had an excellent meeting with Arco in Plano. There is an opportunity for over $15 million in business with Arco over the next two years for Continuum, if Continuum gets off the ground and becomes a company. I made it back to Houston in time for RePAIRS at 7:00. This was the second meeting combining the two RePAIRS groups, and the first combined meeting I had been to. One lady's husband had cheated on her. Another lady could not open up, and as she struggled I could see myself a year ago. It was a sad and emotionally worthwhile evening. Wednesday was my first regular day in the office in a long time. That evening I took Roger Anderson, Albert Boulanger, and Mike Forest out to a nice French restaurant. Albert has done an excellent job of outlining how Lamont can be of benefit to Continuum as a product incubator. In my mind, Roger has always been the best man. Wednesday evening Albert was the best man.
Thursday morning John Amason and I met with the marketing director of PGS. She later decided she could not pursue having Continuum put a 1-wall immersive environment in their booth at the SEG because of expense and risk. I expect we will do this at the AAPG in Dallas next spring. Friday John had me take out his three recruits for Continuum out to lunch. We are really seeing a good team come together. Now if we can get the company on track. John is the best man. In the evening I spent a little time with Melanie, who is doing a wonderful job of organizing the 100+ boxes which are/were in my bedroom (.../9730.html and .../9744.html). Larry fixed Melanie, Rob, and Joe Amason dinner, and since they had other plans, I took off to see a movie. `The Mark of Zoro' was sold out, and so I went to `The Parent Trap.' I loved it, as it fits my simplistic fantasy world. Too bad life isn't like the fairy tales I am attracted to.
Paul wrote a nice letter this week. It includes:
This letter got me continuing to wonder, `Who is the best man?' Paul is the best man.
Most of Saturday was spent being Mike's best man. Laundary, a run around the block, a haircut, offending Karen over the phone, meeting with John Amason about Continuum, a wedding present, gas and a car wash, the grocery store, visiting the Walden 3-D mail box, etc. were also fit in. In the morning, Larry and I worked with Mike, Janet, and her family to move chairs, set up ladders, blow up balloons, decorate the gym with streamers, and generally help make a nice environment. I was later than intended (6:40 instead of 6:15) getting to the wedding because of all the errands. Mike had not started getting dressed yet. Janet did not arrive until 7:00. Then Mike remembered he forgot the rings (we borrowed rings and I went to his house and got them during the reception). Janet's father and sister (from Mexico) went to the wrong church, and the ceremony ended up starting a half-hour late. I had asked Anderea Slack to play the organ, and she did a great job of filling in the time. She has never had a half hour interlude to make up before. It reminded me of Rob and his tuxedo (.../9823.html) at Ben and Sarah's wedding and of seeing `The Wedding Singer' with Melanie on the way back from London. The evening turned out to be a great success. Corey Grua, Dan Jones, Larry Lae, Alan Peterson, and Brent Weber all came at 11:00 to help clean everything up. Watching these friends and role models really made me think about who is the best man.
Today was Fast & Testimony meeting, and my thoughts about the best man have carried across the day. Quiet and solid Brent Peterson was conducting, and bore his testimony about stepping outside of himself to talk to a neighbor. I will never forget the Sunday when I was in the Bishopric, had stayed to count tithing with Brent, who was the clerk, and the member of another Bishopric stepped in. I had turned in a tithing check for about $70,000 (yes, we used to have some real money), and Brent did not blink an eye as he entered the data. I was and continue to be so appreciative of his spirit and candor. Brent is the best man. Then Gary Jones stood and bore testimony about the strength he and his family have received as Roetta has gone through a bone marrow transplant and is just coming out of a month of isolation in a bubble today. As you should know, Gary and I have worked closely together for years, in China and at Landmark. I chuckle every time I think of the time we were on an elevator in Beijing with a young Japanese couple and as we exited Gary said something to them in Japanese (he served his mission in Japan). I asked him what was going on. Gary responded the guy wanted sex, the girl didn't, and he just said excuse me. Gary is the best man. Then Corey Grua, my High Priest Group Leader, and one of the kindest, most caring men I know stood and bore his testimony about the strength of our ward. Corey is the best man. Later Mike Smith stood and bore his testimony, mentioning by innuendo his trials of the last 2 1/2 years, and his deep appreciation for the friends and help he has received in The Nottingham Country Ward. He and Janet are going to live in her house in Memorial Ward so Janet's kids can stay in the same schools. Mike is the best man. There were several sisters and youth who also bore there testimonies. And one of the last to stand was Ron Burgerner. He just finished rereading The Book of Mormon as part of the annual Ron Burgerner summer challenge to read the Book of Mormon. His testimony was strong! His words cut to the core! He knows, as I know, the importance, power, and truthfullness of The Book of Mormon. Ron is the best man.
It is my impression these thoughtlets are getting a bit old for several of you (including carbon-copied relatives). I understand if you wish to be taken off the list. So, as a check to see if you are reading these, and to get confirmation you want to remain on the list, I will not send any of you (except to Paul, Grandma, and Mom) any more of these e-mail's until you individually confirm you want me to keep them coming. My goals are to pass on expeiences that benefit for you, and to help you each get to know me better. I recognize I have a tendency to push too hard, and so this is my way of backing off. I hope you understand my motivation in this effort. Even if it is mostly ego and a desire for recognition motivating autobiographies and personal histories (and thoughtlets), I know how much I have gained from reading about other people's experiences. I know how much I appreciate Grandma Hafen's history, how much I wish I had a more complete history of my Mom, and each of my ancestors. And I hope someday this effort, along with Prime Words, will be truly useful to each of you. I want my daughters to each be the best women. And I want my sons to each be the best man. Not for me. For each of you, for your spouses, and for your decendents."